Tag: medication

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Mental Health Update – June 2025

It has been an interesting few months since I last shared how I have been doing. I was in a depression for quite a while and was having a hard time forcing myself to go places and do things. For example, I skipped a lot of church because I just couldn’t make myself go (thankfully, I can watch the services online). I even had a few days where I was crying for no specific reason.

I did talk to my psychiatrist and we increased one of my meds. She originally suggested increasing the antidepressant, but I worried about doing that because of the bipolar 2 dx, so we increased the mood stabilizer instead. (I see her through an autism clinic, so she had forgotten that I also had the bipolar 2 dx, or she probably wouldn’t have made the first suggestion.)

About three weeks ago, I woke up on a Sunday and my first thought was, I would like to go to church today. It has been the same the last two Sundays as well, even this past Sunday after I stayed up most of the night scrolling TikTok. Normally that would be a reason for me to skip, but I knew that I wanted to go. I’m glad I went because the service was great and the sermon was powerful. I even had successful conversations with a couple of people!

I am feeling a bit upset today because Saturday was my 30-year anniversary with my company and no one has acknowledged it in any way. The same thing happened with my 25th, but I chalked that up to COVID; at the time, I had been cut to part-time and was thankful to still have a job.

On a good note, I am starting to look forward to a trip my son and I are taking in September to visit my family in Illinois. I was feeling very anxious about how I would handle it given how depressed I have been, but now it feels much more manageable. Hopefully, I will still feel that way when the time comes.

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Catching Up – July 2024

I wanted to write a catch up post since it has been a while. The main areas I want to cover are Michael, work, health, church, and friends.

Michael left his job in May. He was having an emotional crisis and just couldn’t handle it anymore. I’m not going to post the details because it’s not my story to tell, but it was a difficult time. It has taken a while to get new services in place, but we are meeting with a new employment agency next week, and he is planning to complete a community based work assessment. This will involve working for a few hours at several different jobs to see what he likes and has aptitude for. It will also help the new agency to get to know him.

Work is going well. I am continuing to enter new products and also supporting the staff with the ERP. I recently approached my boss about reviewing my title and compensation and did get a new title and a raise. My title has changed from Data Specialist to Software Analyst, which I feel is a good reflection of what I have been doing for a while now.

I have been making a lot of progress on my health lately. I met with a new psychiatrist. She is a nurse practitioner at the Penn State Hershey autism clinic. Our first appointment was about an hour and a half, and we covered a lot of information in that time! We decided to keep my meds where they are for right now and reassess at our next appointment. I am currently taking Risperidone and Sertraline. I am thinking of trying to switch from the Risperidone to a mood stabilizer that would be less likely to cause weight gain.

I also had an EGD recently to check for the level of eosinophils in my esophagus. The pathology report seems to say there weren’t any, which is good news, although the doctor did say there were rings and inflammation visible, which is continued evidence of EOE. I have a telehealth appointment scheduled with my allergist to discuss next steps and what medication would be most appropriate for me.

Another important step I took was visiting a new dentist. I have had one bad experience since leaving my previous dentist due to an insurance issue, but I was hopeful about this one because I had gotten a good referral to them. I was so pleased with them – everyone was friendly and helpful. The doctor explained everything very well, and we are going to work through my dental issues over time. I am scheduled with them for a cleaning and two cavities to be taken care of. I also got referrals for one tooth extraction and one possible root canal. I think that will be a good start, although there will still be more to be done.

My diabetes is going okay. I have had a harder time lately keeping my carbs down. My A1C recently went up from 5.9 to 6.4. The doctor was still happy with that, but I know that I need to do a better job. It’s a constant struggle!

I am still loving my church, The Journey. I am actually watching the service from this morning as I write this post. I didn’t go because I was feeling depressed when I woke up and couldn’t get myself together to go in person. Thankfully, they stream the service online. I have joined the community ministry team and am looking forward to my first event with them, the Back to School party. It’s a Saturday afternoon community event with free food and haircuts and backpacks with school supplies. I am going to help with registration.

With regard to friends, I am still seeing Kim most Saturdays for lunch and a movie. She is going through a difficult time right now. Renee has been busy, but we still text and talk sometimes. I am hoping to plan a visit soon. I have done a couple of things with Suzanne, and she is a good support if I am having a hard day. On a sad note, I haven’t had any contact with Jessyca for several weeks. She lost her job and the last I heard from her was two days after that happened. She has not responded to any of my messages since then. I am so sad about this because I miss her a great deal and I also am quite worried about her.

So that’s an update on my life right now. I feel good about the progress I have made in a lot of areas, and I am looking forward to continuing my efforts to make things better.

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Catching Up – February 2024

My new decor.

A lot has happened the last few weeks, so I wanted to jot things down for myself to remember.

Michael started working his first job in mid-December, and he is currently working 12 hours per week. The job is at a laundry facility that supports the Fort Indiantown Gap. He is working with linens and towels. There have been a few challenges as he learns the job, but he is continuing to improve.

Also in mid-December, I started having swallowing issues again and went in early February to have an endoscopy with dilation. In the meantime, I also visited an allergist to discuss my problems eating eggs. Now that I have been diagnosed with diabetes, it would be helpful to be able to eat eggs. (I can eat them as an ingredient in baked goods, just not in their original form.) The allergist told me about a new medication, Dupixent, that treats EOE and said I might be a candidate for it. She is requesting my GI records to evaluate my case.

After my endoscopy, the GI doc said he did find increased eosinophils and prescribed a steroid called Budesonide. I can only get it in a capsule, however, and I am terrified to try to swallow it because I have gotten pills stuck before. It also can increase blood sugar, and I don’t have a way to check my sugar right now. My PCP said she could put me on a continuous glucose monitor if I needed it. I have decided to just wait until I meet with the allergist to discuss the Dupixent again before I choose whether to take the Budesonide. Another factor is that the GI doc didn’t answer my questions about the medication despite my sending multiple messages to his office, and the allergist is very thorough in explaining things.

In other news, I have been getting more involved at my new church. The women’s table group I was a part of last fall has started again, so I am enjoying that. I also attended my first Ash Wednesday service. It was quite moving, and I have joined a Lenten book study that the pastor is leading weekly over Zoom. We have just had one meeting so far, and there were eight of us including the pastor. I was very nervous to participate, but I did force myself to speak up one time during the session. I am hopeful that by preparing my thoughts ahead of time, I will be able to participate more during the rest of the sessions.

Another thing I am going to be doing at church is greeting one service a month. I met with the hospitality team leader and she showed me what was involved, and next Sunday will be my first time doing it. I am actually not nervous about interacting with people because it should be pretty straightforward. The only thing I am nervous about is whether the arthritis in my right hip will act up. It does bother me when I am standing during worship at church, but I think if I move around a bit while greeting, it will be okay.

In friend news, Renee had her third back surgery. The doctor replaced her remaining rod with two new curved rods and also put in something to help the vertebrae grow. I am seeing Kim weekly for lunch and a movie. Yesterday, she helped me hang the two puzzles in the picture above. I’m really happy with them.

I have also made two new friends at church – Suzanne and Jessyca. Suzanne and I have gotten together three times for dinner, and Jessyca is coming over tomorrow to do a puzzle. I have met some other people that I talk to at church as well. It feels good to be expanding my circle a bit!

I’ll wrap up here as that is quite a lot for one post!

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My Journey with Psych Meds

I have a love/hate relationship with psych meds. I have been on and off anti-depressants for about 16 years, since Michael was 5 months old. I had struggled with mental health issues for years without getting any help, but after Michael was born I experienced severe postpartum depression and was barely functioning. I finally told my doctor what was going on and she prescribed my first anti-depressant.

After a few years on the medication, I found it wasn’t really working the way it had been. I was on Celexa and my emotions were so muted that I don’t think I would have reacted even if the house were on fire. At that point the doctor switched me to Wellbutrin. It worked great for a couple of years, giving me some energy and making me more connected with things again. But after a while, I found it was making me too agitated and had to stop it.

I tried other things but didn’t find one that worked and I ended up not taking anything for a while. I was in therapy by this point and even though I switched therapists a couple of times, it was helpful.

I eventually went back on an anti- depressant. When I went through the separation from my ex-husband, I was really struggling so the doctor increased my dosage a couple of times. Over the next few months, things got really weird. I was exhibiting strange behaviors and out of control moods. I finally told my psychiatrist everything that was going on and she realized that I had been experiencing hypomania, brought on by the increase in the anti-depressant.

She then diagnosed me with bipolar 2 and put me on a mood stabilizer. We tried several different ones, but I kept having lots of side effects such as being groggy. Finally we tried Risperdal and it worked great. I was still dealing with depression and anxiety so I also took Prozac for that. As long as I take the Risperdal, the Prozac doesn’t trigger any hypomania.

Things were stable for quite a while, but then I gradually stopped taking the Prozac. I was feeling disconnected and having trouble engaging with life and I thought things would be better without it. But instead I was miserable. I had to increase my counseling frequency and even that wasn’t really helping. Finally I started taking the Prozac again and now I feel great. I have decided to accept the feeling of being somewhat muted in order to avoid the depression and anxiety.

Things feel pretty stable right now and I’m hopeful that they will continue to be that way. I am down to one a month counseling and see the psychiatrist every three months, which is great for my budget as well. It’s easier to focus and be productive and I’m not sidetracked by constant worrying or preoccupation with my moods. All in all, taking the meds is the best way to go for me.

Have you ever tried psych meds? What has your experience been?